Understanding Social Anxiety
There are many factors that can play into social anxiety. It's much more than simply not liking social settings or situations where you’re around a lot of people. Understanding social anxiety can help you to see that it’s a condition which is manageable. With that in mind, let’s take a look at some of the common causes of social anxiety and what social anxiety looks like in daily life.
Genetics
Being at risk of developing social anxiety isn’t always something you can control. Your genetics might play a part. For example, if your family has a history of anxiety — diagnosed or not — you might be more susceptible to certain types of anxiety yourself. Studies of family members have shown that if you have a first-degree relative with social anxiety, you are at increased risk of developing social anxiety.
Negative Experiences
Your environment and experiences are major factors that can contribute to social anxiety. Even things that happen early on in life, like abuse at home, bullying at school, or witnessing a traumatic event, can impact you years later.
When your confidence is tarnished at a young age, you might go through your formative years with low self-esteem. Eventually, that can lead to assuming the worst about yourself in social situations. So, you start to fear social situations and feel like it would be easier to stay withdrawn.
If you’ve ever been teased, rejected, or neglected, you might also develop social anxiety. People, in general, want to fit in. No one wants to feel rejected or like their thoughts and opinions don’t matter. Experiencing that kind of rejection can make you fearful of social situations where it could happen again.
Finally, modeling in an early environment can impact the development of social anxiety. A parent who is excessively fearful and anxious in social situations and uses avoidance to cope models this behavior to a child who, in turn, comes to see social interaction as something to be feared and avoided.
What does Social Anxiety Look Like?
Social anxiety typically manifests in the form of thoughts, physical sensations, and behaviors. Thoughts typically center around fears of being judged negatively by others, particularly being seen as incompetent or strange. Physical sensations are the typical physical symptoms that accompany anxiety, increased heart rate, excessive sweating, or blushing. But people with social anxiety will sometimes develop fears that these physical symptoms will be seen and judged negatively by others. Social anxiety often manifests in the behavior of those who struggle with the disorder; they will typically avoid social situations completely. Or, they engage in social situations but will use avoidance behaviors (e.g., checking their phones, limiting or cutting social interactions short). Often, people with social anxiety can appear aloof or introverted to others because they seem uninterested in engaging or staying in social situations.
What Triggers Social Anxiety?
Even if you struggle with social anxiety, it likely doesn’t impact you all of the time. You may not necessarily have to be walking around filled with anxious thoughts every day. This is especially true for people with social anxiety who have set up their lives in ways that minimize social interactions. However, certain things might trigger those thoughts and make it difficult to get through specific situations.
Everyone’s triggers are different but some of the most common social anxiety triggers include public speaking, eating in public, making phone calls, presenting, or meeting new people, or interacting with authority figures (e.g, professors, bosses). These are all situations that might lead to increased anxiety and fear of judgment.
What Can You Do?
There are several things you can do on your own to make it easier to manage your social anxiety. Practice mindfulness and meditation to stay grounded in the present. Keep a journal to track your anxious thoughts and identify situations that trigger you. Try making a list of the social situations you typically avoid, from least anxiety-provoking to most anxiety provoking, and slowly challenge yourself to engage in new social situations. Remember to focus on being fully present in the situation, that is stay off your phone and stay away from other avoidance behaviors; these behaviors prevent you from learning that you can be in social situations and be okay. Praise yourself each time you engage. Each engagement in a social situation is a big win! Engaging over and over in social situations will typically help decrease your social anxiety over time.
It’s important to note that more severe cases of social anxiety will typically require exposure-based treatment. A therapist trained in the treatment of social anxiety will work with you to identify the negative thoughts that fuel your social anxiety, develop adaptive coping responses, and identify situations where you can systematically apply your new skills.
Ultimately, it’s okay to feel some nerves when you’re in social settings. But if you feel crippled by your anxiety and it’s affecting your life, it’s time to talk to someone. Don’t hesitate to reach out to a therapist trained in the treatment of social anxiety.
Chanderbhan Psychological Services
About: Chanderbhan Psychological Services is a therapy practice located in Laredo, Texas. We help individuals and couples who are struggling in different areas of their lives gain the clarity they need to grow and change. We also offer telehealth to individuals located in the wider State of Texas. To read blogs on mental health and relationships, visit our website.
